Wednesday, May 17, 2006
 

GOOD NEWS: WE'RE ALL YOUNGER THAN WE THOUGHT!
Today is Cheryl’s birthday.
While she and her family were out for dinner, Jake and Gabriel scrambled to get some pictures completed. Jake was working on a birthday decoration for her “party” and Gabriel was working on a page from his Star Wars coloring book, which I’m almost positive he had no intention of giving to anyone.
The Citizens ended up coming back before the pictures were finished, however, and Emma and Loredana came into the room to see what the boys were up to.
This is the conversation that was overheard (as close to word-for-word as I could remember):
Loredana: Is that for my mom?
Jake: Yeah.
Gabriel: Yeah, she can pretend it’s a real coloring birthday.
Emma is in the background, trying to explain that it isn’t a pretend birthday. She gives up and leaves.
Gabriel (cont.): It isn’t a real birthday.
Loredana: Yeah, it isn’t a fun birthday, like a kid birthday.

Isn’t that great to know? Once they stop feeling fun, we don’t have to count them anymore!

OH YEAH…
Also heard during the lighting of the (many) candles:
Jake: Wow! You’re so old!

 

 

Thursday, May 11, 2006
 

MOTHER'S DAY TEA
Today, Gabriel's three-year old class "hosted" a Mother's Day Tea. While the moms had to provide all of the food, the class did the rest. The tables, usually littered with paint and pom-poms, were covered with tablecloths and flowers, each mom was presented with a corsage, and signs were hung around the room, with quotes from the kids about why each of them loved their mom.
Gabriel and I sat together, sipping our "tea", which he poured for me himself, and enjoying our peanut butter and jelly. On our way out, one of his teachers made sure to hand me a flowerpot, explaining that Gabriel had painted the pot, picked the flower and planted it on his own...all for me.
Boy, did I leave feeling special.
It was during the drive home - Bob Dylan playing, the kids looking at comic books, me pondering what I would do during naptime - when I looked down and noticed the f@#*ing flowerpot had tipped over and dumped soil all over the floor of the van.
Suddenly, I knew exactly what I'd be doing during naptime.
And did I EVER feel like a mom.

 

 

Monday, April 24, 2006
 

TALK ABOUT PSYCHOSOMATIC
A few days ago, I sliced my thumb cutting open an orange. I have since kept it covered, alternating between the two types of Band-Aids that we own: Spider-Man and Elmo. This has resulted in constant torture for Sara, who keeps grabbing for my appealing, colorful, yet still sore, bandaged thumb and proclaiming, "My Elmo!" or "My Ma-Man!"
I finally gave in today and let her pick out her own Elmo Band-Aid. Of course, she wanted it on her thumb, but given the amount of time her fingers spend in her mouth, I talked her into putting it right below her knee. Once applied, she looked at it, stood proudly and said, "Pretty!"
Fast forward a few hours to where I am changing her diaper in preparation for nap. I remove the old diaper and then grab her by the legs so I can lift her bum high enough to slip the fresh diaper underneath. We do this exact thing, every day, about five times a day. I incidentally grab her leg where the Band-Aid is and realize my mistake when she starts protesting, "Ouchie, ouchie!" and grabbing her bandaged leg.
I really should be more careful.

 

 

Sunday, April 16, 2006
 

MY 200TH POST
Gabriel and Sara are in Gabriel's bedroom with the door closed and it is very quiet.
I should go in and check on them, seeing as they are both young and predisposed to get into things they shouldn't. Truth is, though, I don't want to.
I'm afraid of what I'll find.

 

 

Saturday, April 15, 2006
 

LITTLE OBSERVER
One of Sara's favorite things to do is label things. If I'm doing laundry, she'll hand me one of my shirts and say, "Mommy's." She'll point to one of Gabriel's toys and say, "Babiel's" or grab Jake's sandals from the shelf and say, "Jee's".
Sometimes, I'm amazed at the little things she picks up on.
Last night at dinner, our waiter discreetly laid our check down as he cleared away some plates. Sara patted it and said, "Daddy's."
Smart girl.

 

 

Friday, April 14, 2006
 

QUALITY PROGRAMMING
While I was working out earlier, I glanced up at the television screens that hang from the ceiling, noticing one in particular. It said that if "you or someone you know is involved in a transvestite love triangle" contact the Jerry Springer show.
A transvestite love triangle...I don't even know what that is!
I can't believe this situation is common enough to need a whole show devoted to it.

 

 

Wednesday, April 05, 2006
 

OUCH
Just in case you aren't convinced of that whole "Kids crave structure and rules" argument:

GABRIEL: Mom, do you want me to be Venom for Halloween or just Peter (from Narnia)?

MOM: Umm, who do you want to be?

GABRIEL: Just tell me who you want me to be. Take care of me and tell me what I need to do!